Acepting the situation

Monday, May 30, 2011

Diary of a Struggling Man

Let me take you back to 1984. It was my sister’s friend’s wedding; I was a young male who was fresh from the United States Army Basic Training. My sister, Heseland, introduced me to one of her friends named Dale. Dale was attending Boys and Girls Height School in Brooklyn, New York. From that moment on, we were a match made in Heaven. We were together ever since. We had our share of ups and downs, but we stuck it out. We had two boys, and then we moved to Miami, Florida, in 1995. Then we had one more boy. We were a family of five, and everything was okay for a while. We were active in the church, and I was striving to be a minister. But in 1994, Dale was diagnosed with lupus. Many doctors visits, hospital attendance, and medical bills began to take effect. After a while, there was no trace of the infirmity in her body. I credit that to the prayers of the righteous, the late Harriet Jones and the members of Holy Ghost Tabernacle Church, and also our family and friends who labored in prayer.

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

James 5:16 (nlt)

After some time passed, Dale was then diagnosed with a spinal virus called HTLV1—Tropical Plastic Periphrastic. This virus attacks the spine and the lower part of the body, which sometimes travels to the respiratory system. From that point on, things started to decrease dramatically. One of the first signs was that she started to drag her feet when she walked. In 1991, when the former President Bill Clinton came to the University of Miami to campaign, Dale and I, along with our oldest boy, Jaron, went to see the President. When we were leaving the campaign site, because Dale could not lift her feet too high, she tripped on a crack on the sidewalk and fell, busting her lips and teeth. From that day on, life was a downward motion.

Then she began to lose her ability to walk. She had to use a walking cane, and before you knew it, she had to use a wheel chair. When she had no ability to walk at all, she was diagnosed as permanently disabled. She began to lose her ability to write, and then she had difficulty seeing, breathing and eating. But with the love that I had for my wife, there was no doubt that I was going to be by her side to the end. This went on for approximately ten years. There were many hospital visits, surgeries, emergencies, etc. I remember the tubes that were put down her throat and in her side to feed her and help her breathe. Yes, there were times when I was tired and frustrated. Yes, only God knows. It was a long challenging road. I can personally tell you, whether you believe in God or not, a higher power than man must have been looking over me because there is no way I could have handled all that. I know it was God holding me and guiding me through this trial.

Imagine trying to take care of a disabled person, without much help from insurance for medical bills, raising three growing boys, paying for the regular household bills and the needs concerning the necessity of life, trying to hold down two jobs to keep my family above water, and trying to keep up with the boys schooling.

I was a shy and quiet person, but there were many, many times I wished and hoped and prayed that somebody would come by to offer some physical help. I am not insinuating that no one helped us, but the burden, the task and all the things that needed to be done were so much that we needed much more than basic help.

On the morning of December 15, 2005, I was getting ready to leave work from doing a graveyard shift when I got a phone call from one of my sons, informing me that Dale had passed away in her sleep. I began to scream as a if piece of my flesh had been ripped from my body. When you get a phone call saying that your wife or your husband is no more, what would be your reaction? I could not handle the fact that I would be without someone to talk to and have funny conversations with at night. From that moment on, I was like an empty vessel.

Here I was ordained as an elder in the church, but hurting on the inside like a little baby that lost its first love. I preached and ministered to people, yet hurt on the inside. I went to work and supervised people, yet hurt on the inside. I still had to do the necessities to provide for my three boys, who were growing day by day. I would ask myself, “When will it end? When will I be able to say the hurting is over and my vessel has some substance inside it?”

I was searching for anything or anybody to fulfill my hunger for fulfillment. I looked good on the outside, but inside I was like dried up bones. I had no one to talk to.
I was so lonely that I would find myself wanting to go to work to keep from thinking of crazy things. I began to pray that God would give me a companion, someone just to talk to and keep a conversation with. But it never happened. So finally I realized that no one was coming, and that my life is what I make it.

Carl Mathis: author of Life is what you make it – seven steps to moving forward
Go here now http://www.carlmathis.com

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Overcoming the grieving process

Introduction

In 2005, my life took a turn in a direction that I was
not expecting. Something occurred that changed the
course of my life in a dramatic way; as a result, I had to
make some adjustments to put my life back together.

Whenever you encounter a dramatic change in
your life unexpectedly, your life becomes difficult to
deal with. Sometimes you find yourself depending on
another to fill that gap.

There was a time when I was challenged with a situation
in my life, which caused me to depend
on someone to come to my rescue. I waited for a long
time hoping someone would come assist me with my
needs. I found out that life is what you make it, and that
another cannot make your life for you.

The life that you inherit is the result of your own
action. Although God will sometimes give you the
direction and even provide the means to accomplish a
certain thing, in the end you are the only one that could
make it come into reality.

So if you are in a similar situation and find yourself
wondering why no one is coming to your rescue, if you
want to do something about it, this book is for you.

LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT - SEVEN STEPS TO MOVING FORWARD
Go here now to purchase or for more information http://www.carlmathis.com

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Literary Gumbo - interview author of Life is what you make it (Carl Mathis)

About the Author

Christian author, preacher and motivational speaker Carl Mathis began his work for the ministry in 2005 after a life-altering experience. At that time, the death of Mathis’ wife was the reason behind the dramatic turn of events that soon led him to his life’s purpose and calling.

Dealing with the loss of his wife and raising three children as a single father while struggling to make ends meet, Mathis had to contend with unbearable feelings of hopelessness and despair. It was during those moments that Mathis cried out for a strategy to overcome his situation. This experience soon pushed him to channel is grief and use its transforming power to change his own life and others as well.

Immediately after getting back on track, Mathis was moved to act on his burning desire to encourage and motivate people, especially those who have shared the same fate as him. It was then Mathis saw the need to reach out to the distressed and the depressed.
In 2010, he came out with his debut work entitled Life is What You Make It – seven steps to moving forward, a 104 page inspirational book drawn from his own personal life experiences and challenges. Filled with messages on how to deal with sorrow and ultimately survive the process of moving on, the book provides readers with the much-needed encouragement and motivation in order to strive better.

A man after God’s own heart, Mathis continues his passion today of reaching out to people using his God-given abilities, particularly speaking and writing, and becoming a blessing to others in return.

Tell us an experience about your writing process.
I have learned that writing is a craft in it self, what I am saying is not every one is cut out to be a writer. The process is long and tedious with a creative mind set. When I wrote Life is what you make it: seven steps to moving forward and submitted it to my publisher, they loved the concept, but as requested I changed some parts. In fact I had to rewrite about 80% of the manuscript to come to the company’s liking. So this was an experience in it self. If I wasn’t committed to fulfilling the project I started, things just may have been a little different, but I was determined and focus on pursuing this craft.

Is there anything you have learned and maybe wish you had known?
Because the craft of writing found me in such an unusual way, I had the liberty of finding out a few things I wish I had known prior to tackling this craft. I must say that it was not in my plans to become a writer, of even thought about writing a book, it’s seems like it just crept up on me out of nowhere. While sitting at my desk putting down some information, one thing leads to the next and before I knew it a manuscript was established. However, there were a few missing components, such as having a platform and a brand. In other words I need some credibility to what I am doing, so I had to back track and build a platform.

Are there any myths you have discovered about being a writer?
I have not found any myth about being a writer; however, it was revealed to me how dedicated and focus you must be to become a good writer. One must continued to write until it becomes a daily routine.

Please share your experiences with publication.
My experience with publication has been challenge and a great learning experience at the same time. I found out that publication can get you on some good avenues, but getting the word out for your book/project has to be your responsibility. Publishers have a certain way they want their manuscript to be formatted and laid out. But at the same time it’s not an easy thing to get a publisher to accept your work, they look for an individual who has a track record and could potentially sell a good amount of books. So being not so well known as some of the more established authors made it was a little challenging for me to get a publisher.

What is your pattern for timely effective writing?
Writing is a craft in a class by itself. However, just as any project or job that needs to be completed in a timely manner, it needs a well laid out plan.
One of the first things to be considered is resource into the topic and the content about what you’re writing about. Always remember that content is imperative and adds value and ingredients to your credibility, which would transcend to people drawing close to your work. I believe that this should be done before you attempt to write your manuscript.

You then want to create an outline to follow. This will help prevent you from writers block or quieting at the half way point, because you now know what you have to do to complete what you have started. With the resource and the outline done first, you have a good chance at a well formatted manuscript. The outline should consist of a Headline, an Introduction, a Body, a Conclusion and in some cases, a little information about the author.

Headline – This should be most appealing as possible because readers read this first then decide if he or she will continue reading the rest of the manuscript. In most cases they will just take a glance at the cove and scan over the headline, and if it’s not appealing they will put it down and move on.
Introduction – many has made the mistake in putting too much into the introduction, this will give way for the reader to lose interest in continuing at all. They will feel like they have already figured out the end result. Just introduce the problem you will be discussing in your manuscript or write a few paragraphs some relevant experience while introducing the plot.

Body – This is where you discuss all the solutions to the problem you expressed in the Introduction. You want to break up each point into separate paragraphs; this will give the reader a good understanding of what he/she is reading. A good idea is to create a sub-heading for each point to allow an easy read. Most people scan before reading, so sub-headings work in your favor.

Conclusion - this is where you summarize your story and pressure a call for action. Make sure there is a solution to the problem you explained in the body. Be direct in leading the readers, make sure they will fully understand what it is that needs to be understood.

Some things to keep in mind:
Write with passion and inspiration – in other words, write like you would explain something to your friend. Don’t worry too much about correcting mistakes or how it sounds. As long as the flow of thoughts is flowing, keep writing, you never want to break the train of thoughts. You can always correct them later. When you are finish writing, take a break, then come back and take a fresh look at what you have written, and make your adjustments. Make sure it flows well by clearly identifying the problem, providing a solution and concluding with an action step or steps. It’s a good idea to get someone else to read it over. Often they will find the mistakes that you missed. One of the most important things is going over your manuscript several times. This will help you catch the little things you might normally over look.

About the Book
Carl Mathis wasn’t prepared for the devastation the loss of his wife would bring to his life. He soon found himself grieving, struggling to make ends meet, and trying to raise his sons, who were also dealing with personal turmoil from the loss of their mother. After months of waiting for someone to rescue him, Carl had to face the inevitable truth–no one was coming. He realized that if he wanted out of the mess his life was becoming, he was going to have to do it himself.

Join new author Carl Mathis in this motivational story about one man’s struggle to put his life back together. Life Is What You Make It will teach you how to overcome any crippling situation you find yourself in and stimulate personal and spiritual growth by accepting the situation, taking responsibility, conditioning your mind, choosing to make right decisions, building a team, believing, and defining the new normal.

Purchase the Book Online at:
http://www.Amazon.com
http://www.BarnesandNoble.com
http://www.BooksaMillion.com
Visit the author at http://www.CarlMathis.com

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Sormag's Blog: interview of Life is what you make make it

Life is What You Make It Blog Tour
Posted by LaShaunda Labels: BLOG TOUR


Tell us about Life is what you make it – seven steps to moving forward.

“Carl Mathis wasn't prepared for the devastation the loss of his wife would bring to his life. He soon found himself grieving, struggling to make ends meet, and trying to raise his sons, who were also dealing with personal turmoil from the loss of their mother. After months of waiting for someone to rescue him, Carl had to face the inevitable truth--no one was coming. He realized that if he wanted out of the mess his life was becoming, he was going to have to do it himself. Join new author Carl Mathis in this motivational story about one man's struggle to put his life back together. Life Is What You Make It will teach you how to overcome any crippling situation you find yourself in and stimulate personal and spiritual growth by accepting the situation, taking responsibility, conditioning your mind, choosing to make right decisions, building a team, believing, and defining the new normal.”

How did you come up with ideas for this book?

At the grieving period of my life when I lost my wife, I was looking for someone to come to my rescue, but help didn’t come as I hope it would. After waiting and seeing my life slowing going down, I decided that no one is coming, so life ended up what I made it out to be. The idea for this book came to me in an unusual way. I was sitting at the computer one day just putting some thoughts down about my past experience of what I went through, then one thing lead to next, and this book was established.

Who are your main character(s)?

The main characters in the book are Carl Mathis, and his three sons Jaron, Carl JR and Torrey Mathis.

• Did you have a favorite character(s)? Who and why? No
• Did you have to do quite a bit of research for this novel?

I did some, but because this book was about my experience, it was like researching me.

What do you hope readers will learn/discover from reading Life is what you make it: seven steps to moving forward?

I hope the readers read the book with an open mind and be ready for changes! Great things are in store for every life that yearns for the Truth, and when you embrace it, the way you see life will completely change for the better. Remember: it's all up to you. One can accomplish anything he/she puts their mind to.
Okay, a not-so-fun question. How important are reviews to you as a writer?Reviews are very important, because this tells me what at lease some of the readers are saying, plus it gives value and credibility to your work.

About the Book

Carl Mathis wasn’t prepared for the devastation the loss of his wife would bring to his life. He soon found himself grieving, struggling to make ends meet, and trying to raise his sons, who were also dealing with personal turmoil from the loss of their mother. After months of waiting for someone to rescue him, Carl had to face the inevitable truth–no one was coming. He realized that if he wanted out of the mess his life was becoming, he was going to have to do it himself.

Join new author Carl Mathis in this motivational story about one man’s struggle to put his life back together. Life Is What You Make It will teach you how to overcome any crippling situation you find yourself in and stimulate personal and spiritual growth by accepting the situation, taking responsibility, conditioning your mind, choosing to make right decisions, building a team, believing, and defining the new normal.

Purchase the Book Online at:

http://www.amazon.com/

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/

http://www.booksamillion.com/

Visit the author at http://www.carlmathis.com/

Visit the blog tour schedule at http://bit.ly/LifeisWhatYouMakeIt

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

All the Buzz Reviews (Life is what you make it)

• Tell us about yourself.
Hi, my name is Carl Mathis; Author of Life is what you make it: seven steps to moving forward. I’ve dedicated my life to helping people achieve their dreams through the word of GOD. When I lost my wife to death in December of 2005, I was faced with the challenges of raising three boys as a single parent, and at the same time coping with the loss of my mate.

During this time, I dealt with many emotions, how can I be a father and mother to my children, how do I deal with the grief of losing my wife. I was faced with many difficulties.

There were times when life brought enjoyment, and other times when life was so challenging that I wanted to give up and quit. However, during such difficult and unbearable moments, I make up my mind to do something about it. I was not going to let this unfortunate situation take over me. I decided to use this terrible and devastating situation as a platform to rebuild my life( I realized that life is what you make it).

I spent many nights crying out to GOD for a strategy to overcome my situation. The strategy I got was, while I am going through my difficulties, share it with others, help them to overcome and at the same time I would overcome. That’s exactly what I did and by doing so, I am so blessed because I am in a much better place than I was years ago.

Now I am on the right path to success. I now have a burning desire to encourage and motivate people and let them know that life is whatever they make it.

I pursue diligently because I see that many people have struggled, and their quality of life has been diminished. It coerces them to give up and throw in the towel. Someone needs to reach out to these people and let them know that they should hold on to their dreams, that they can accomplish anything they put their mind to. I hope to encourage people through my books and teach them how to acquire instruction, motivation and encouragement when striving for their dreams.

• What type of jobs or careers have you worked in the past?
I am a carpenter/handyman by trade. I worked in that field for many years; I also spend three years as an Army National Guard. I worked in the surveillance industry for about seven years as a Surveillance Supervisor for a Casino in Miami Fl.



• Who are your favorite authors?
Although I read varieties of authors, I recently enjoyed books by Max Lucado and TD Jakes, but there are many other good authors I also read.

• What are your favorite books?
Of course, The Bible is the most important book that I will ever have. For any other book, as long as it combines a good plot with a positive or Godly perspective, It will have my attention.

• When did you begin to realize you wanted to write?
I must say that the craft of writing found me in an unusual way; Just the thought of putting information on paper to help someone was fascinating to me. While in the process of overcoming and moving forward from my grieving period, it lead me to put in writing how I was able to triumph over such an obstacle. After a while I began to realize that this is a God giving gift. And I should use it to my advantage. That is when I realized that I wanted to continue writing.

• Tell us about your journey to publication.
My journey to publication was like driving in the middle of rush hour in NYC. What I am saying is, being a new comer on the author seen; I was not given any consideration. There was rejection after rejection from agents and publishers, after a while Tate Publishing accepted my manuscript, and made me rewrite about 75% of the book before they published it.

• Are you a full-time writer? If so, describe your day?
I would not say I am a full time writer, but I am pretty close to it, because I make sure I write every day.
Carl Mathis author of life is what you make it – seven steps to moving forward
Go here now http://www.carlmathis.com for more

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Tragedy to Triumph

In 2005, my life took a turn in a direction that I was not expecting. Something occurred that changed the course of my life in a dramatic way; as a result, I had to
make some adjustments to put my life back together.

Whenever you encounter a dramatic change in your life unexpectedly, your life becomes difficult to deal with. Sometimes you find yourself depending on another to fill that gap.

There was a time when I was challenged with a situation in my life, which caused me to depend on someone to come to my rescue. I waited for a long time hoping someone would come assist me with my needs. I found out that life is what you make it, and that another cannot make your life for you.

The life that you inherit is the result of your own action. Although God will sometimes give you the direction and even provide the means to accomplish a
certain thing, in the end you are the only one that could make it come into reality.

So if you are in a similar situation and find yourself wondering why no one is coming to your rescue, if you want to do something about it, this book is for you.

For more from Carl got to http://www.carlmathis.com